love your neighbor as yourself

i don't if it's because i'm asian (aka indirect) or what a friend would call "passive aggressive", but my "old" (pre-Christ) self would do nice things for others in hopes of getting noticed for those things and having some nice gesture returned.

i must admit, i still struggle with doing kind things without caring what the outcome is. but, God has been good lately and teaching me how to love nat as i would love myself. usually, the sweet husband that he is, gets up and feeds sean so i can get an extra hour of sleep. but nat has been tired recently, so he asked if i could do it. so, i got up early this morning to take care of sean. i must say, i really enjoyed my time this morning and God really filled me with contentment (instead of resentment that i might normally feel) with taking care of him. i didn't feel tired, and i wasn't grumpy, so it was great! also, i've been trying to find ways that i can support nat being at work longer so he can graduate sooner. God has been helping me fight the tendency to want and tell nat to come home early many days just so i can be with him. it has been good, and i think (and hope) that it has been good for nat as well.