for i know the plans i have for you

i didn't get into the teaching program that i applied for: "Although you are a strong candidate, ---- has decided not to invite you to the program because of your uncertainty about leaving Champaign for you internship year."

for this specific program, i needed to teach in the Chicago public school district for a year. i knew this before i applied, i expressed my concern up front to one of the program members, but i was encouraged to apply. anyways, during my interview a few weeks ago, i expressed my hesitancy again b/c of (1) being far away from nat for a year (2) teaching by myself in the Chicago public schools (3) possibly starting a family at the end of the year.

i know that i could have been less up front with my hesitancy, but i felt that God wanted me to be honest and up front, especially since the program would pay my education. and this morning, i felt that God was affirming my decision with ephesians 4:25: "therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body."

i was pretty sure that i had closed the door on the opportunity with my honesty in the interview, but it's still a little hard to find out i didn't get in. this is the first time that i've really been excited about a program and career. right now, I'm not sure what the future holds. on the one hand I'd like to start a family before 30, and on the other hand i'd like to get certified to teach. if we start a family, i feel that i won't have time to go to class and get certified until later. i wonder if i'll be able to go through classes and all those things later. if i wait to apply again for 2007, i feel that i should wait to have kids until later. i don't know why "before 30" is my goal, but i'm realizing that i'll have to surrender all my plans to God.

so, right now, i'm needing to look for a job right now. i don't think we could realistically live off nat's grad student stipend. i'm not sure what kind of jobs are out here in champaign-urbana, but i'd like to get a teaching-related job. but i also know that i will probably have to broaden my horizons and look for jobs related to my MS degrees. i'm also not sure if i should continue looking into getting certified or apply to other programs at the moment. but this morning, i reminded myself that life is an adventure that God takes you on. and His plans, even in His surprises, are exciting and good. so, i'm trying my best to suppress my innate nature of freaking out and feeling like i have to look for a job right now. =)

i was wondering if any of you had experience with alternative certification and if you could tell me about it. also, i was wondering if you had any ideas or lead of any jobs, both teaching-related or human-computer interaction/human factors jobs, in the champaign-urbana area? thanks for your help!