woe is not me

i had a "woe is me" attitude for about a week after nat left. i liked it when people sympathized, emphatized, and took pity one me. i'd go as far as to say that i expected attention from people and for them to minister to my loneliness.

after a week of self-pity, i realized that there were lots of things to be thankful for. i began to give thanks to God for the blessings that He has given nat and i, despite our separation. by God's mercy, He has allowed me to have joy. this joy has also lifted me from my selfish desire of having people minister to my needs, and for me to be more hospitable to others. when i have been tempted to go back to wallowing in my "miserable state", God has brought to mind people that have been separated from their spouses longer than two months. He reminds me of their faith and joy through their circumstances. that reminder shuts me up pretty quick, i must say.

if you're curious what i have given thanks to God for during our separation, here are some things:

• deeper and more thoughtful conversations over e-mail and the phone
• a reminder not to take nat for granted
• the ability for me to be reminded of how much i love nat
• seeing how nat is such a great husband and how he pursues me, even when we're apart
• being able to e-mail every day
• talking on skype for free
• more time to reflect on God individually
• being more prayerful for nat
• seeing the depth of our love for each other and our relationship

the list just goes on and on. thank You God for helping me see Your goodness during our time apart.